MUMBAI KI BARISH OR MERI TANHA ZINDAGI (5 DEC 2017)

Because of Cyclone ockhi in Gujrat and Kerala , it has been raining in Mumbai for two days.School colleges was closed today just for precaution.
Aam Dino me Mai thoda ghr ke bahar b chla jata Hu bt barish me Kaha jau , ha Zohar ki namaz ke liye ghr se nikla .It was still raining but not heavy , mere ghr se niklate hi ek chota SA maidan h , Uske ek traf se rasta h phir thoda aage ek seedhi road h jiske Dono traf 5-6 floor ki buildings h , or ye rasta seedha main road ki traf jata h or whi masjid b h .waise msjid ki traf Jane ke liye or b Raste h bt Mai yhi prefer krta h .mausam suahan to tha hi or thanda b.
Mai hath me umbrella liye barish ki boondo ko yaktak dekhte hue ja rha tha , mahul me ajeeb SA sannata tha bilkul meri Zindagi ki trah .is seedhi road pr chlte hue mujhe kafi arsa ho gya tha , shayad 3-4 Saal ya isse kuch zyada.lekin itne arso me kuch be nhi bdla , SB kuch waisa hi h , road ko or Dono traf building ko to Kabhi Kabhi repair b kr Diya gya tha , Lekin meri adate , mere khyalat SB whi.mai Jin andhero me 4 Saal pehle ghira tha aaj b un andhero se nhi nikal ska , or Mai halat ko kaise Dosh du , ho skta ho halat utne achche nhi rhe , Lekin Zindagi ke aksr takleefo Ka zimmedar mai khud Hu.Or ab mujhe nhi pta Mai in andhero se kaise niklunga , IT graduate hone ke bad b jobless Hu , ghr wale chahte h ki jldi job lg Jaye or Mai b yhi Chahta hu Lekin Mai kaisi b job to nhi le skta na .Ha Lekin shayad Maine kuch job starting me chod kr glti ki thi , Lekin ab to wo bdla nhi ja skta.
Or mere liye job sbse bda msla nhi h , shayad Mera gov result Jo pending h wo aa Jaye or Mai pass ho jau or central government Ka achcha ohda hasil kr lu , ya Microsoft , Google me software developer bn jau. Lekin aage kya hoga , kya yhi tha Zindagi Ka maqsad , isi ke liye log itni takleefe uthate h.Mujhe pta hi nhi Mai Kaha ja rha hu , or Jin rasto pr Mai chl rha hu wo mujhe Zindagi ke maqsad ki traf le jayenge ya nhi.Ya phir Mai us hakeekat ko faramosh kr rha hu Jo aaj se 1400 Saal pehle batha ki sanglakh chattaano se namudar hua tha.
Itni tez raftar duniya me kon mere khyalat samjhega , Mai bs likh kr Apne Dil ko hlka kr let Hu , or Mai ye b samajh gya Hu insan is duniya me tanha h , Uske khyalat koi nhi samajh skta , tanhai sirf tanha hone Ka nam nhi h blki logo se ghira hone ke bad b khud ko tanha mehsus krna h.mai bs Apne khyalo me chla ja rha tha , msjid dikhne lgi thi , barish abhi b ho rhi thi , Maine bedhyani me Apne chehre pr hath phera to hath tr ho gya , Mai thoda hairan hua barish to itni tez nhi h.TBhi Mera ek dost b namaz ke liye aata dikha Mai muskurakr uski traf bdh gya.

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Girl proposed and disappeared

Hello young boy , how’s you doing.Hope , well !
I got the call from international call center and I am going there tomorrow , but the excited things is that I decided something.what it could be….
I am gonna make the vlog , I don’t know how’s it gonna be because I will use my redmi1 mobile , 8mp main and 5mp front camera , neither professional camera nor a mic.But I will do it.
Once I was talking about a girl who proposed me and then suddenly disappeared and came after 1 years.I wanted to write about that , because it was an important story of my life.
So it starts with my aunt who was sick that time so she called her sisters daughter Muskan 17-18 to help her in household work.So Muskan came from Bangalore for 1 month in Mumbai at my uncles home.I saw her first time when I went to see my aunt , she was normal girl , nothing like a girl who take your attention.My aunt told me about her that day.
When I went to see my aunt after some day then no one was there except Muskan.
She told me that they went to hospital for check up.I said okay and about to leave but she asked for tea , I softly denied but she insisted then I said okay and sat down on the chair.She was making tea inside kitchen and I was just sitting in the room and using my phone.
She brought a cup of tea after a while , I took it , but I was shocked when she asked an unexpected question.She asked “Do you have a girlfriend?”.
I didn’t know what should I say her , because in our Muslim society boy-girls don’t talk about this at home.
After a second , I said no , I don’t have.
But the shit I done there was , I asked her too.But her answer was funny. She said she got hundreds of proposal but never accepted anyone.
I asked why ?
She said ” Because I never liked anyone.”
I said , oh ..and I was thinking , things is going in wrong direction.So I ended conversation and leaved home.
After that I tried to stay away from her.
But sometime we need to talk because my aunt was sick , so we used to talk casually, not love kind of topic.
Things was going on , My second year of BSc-IT was about to complete , I was also playing cricket for my college at same time.So little busy schedule , but still I used to go at my uncles home twice or thrice in a week , One month just gone.
So one day when I went there , Muskan was alone at home , after one month we have become a little friendly but not frank.She was sitting on the bed silently , I thought something is wrong , she told me when I asked that she going back tomorrow , I had not attachment or a bit of feelings for her but that moment I just felt little sad.I said , what’s the problem then ?
She said nothing and silently staring me. I was sitting on the chair in front of the bed .she said come here .I said why?
Then she stood up and came just front of me , very close to me , my heart started to beat very fast , because firstly I never faced this kind of situation and secondly if someone would come.
She came very close and said I love you and tears just came out from her eyes.
I was totally shocked but because she was going back tomorrow and her tears ,I was little nervous , I just replied the same word with too.
I really never loved her , but because of the situation it just happened and I was regretting when she went back.
I gave her small gift same day she proposed me not because she proposed me but because she was going.
Despite of I never loved her , I was waiting of her call , I had been waiting for 1 month.
But today it’s been more than one year she never called me , I don’t know why but now she again came back.
And I used the word disappear because I felt like that because she proposed me at the evening and went back on next morning , I didn’t get even time to think means from the time she proposed to till she went , I was in some different world.
And now I am not even gonna meet her , if she were call me then maybe today things would be different.
After everything I am happy , because I never wanted to get involved but things just went on I got involved but luckily automatically it just ended
Everyone’s life is filled with different stories , by the way I am going tomorrow for interview in international call center and with that I will make my vlog.
I am not sure what’s gonna happen , I am not sure where life will take , I am just living a purposeless life , meaningless life and I don’t know when it will change into purposeful.

Addiction , Religion , Politician And a Virgin Boy

No one can imagine if I would say I am addicted of m*********n , I don’t look religious , but people around me and my friend think I am religious. Because they see , sometimes I perform Salah , recite Quran , don’t do anything wrong publicly , But the fact is I am the worst Muslim guy in the face of earth , Despite of not involving in unlawful sexual relationship , not harming others , I have done lot of wrong things , I am not confessing here , I am saying about my feelings , I am 20 virgin but because of nudity in this modern world my feelings goes high , I don’t remember when I did m**********n first time , but after that it became my habit secretly.
I am such a bad guy , I got over this addiction but I started it again , I know this is all my mistake but this shitty world are responsible too, neither I can run away from this nude modern world nor I can control myself after being in this.
I can’t have sex because it’s a big sin , I can’t get marry because I am 20 , IT graduate and jobless , even though if I were have job I can’t get marry at 20 because of fucking rule in our society.
I know marriage is not only about sex but it’s really a good solution to stop yourselves from a zina.
I am remembering one thing on this marriage topic , hadia (name after accepting Islam) 24 , a Hindu girl , accepted Islam and got married with a Muslim guy was arrested by police in this democratic country , but because of women organizations protest and public pressure , court took a strong action and released hadia , people don’t have freedom to choose their own religion in this country , something has changed over the past three years in India , intolerance is growing , I am not against the ruling party of India but really they are spreading fear in the minority , their secret agenda of applying Hindutwa in India is going on , they have changed the syllabus of school , they want to remove historical things made by Muslims emperor’s , one of their leader even said that Taj Mahal is memory of slave era so we should remove it.
But why I am saying all of this , I even don’t have control on my feelings , just living a purposeless life . some people suffer because they don’ know but after knowing many things, I am involving myself in such a wrong things and wasting a great purpose of my life.
What would happen if tomorrow an honest government comes in the power , I would never come out from the darkness I created .
After wasting 6 month now I applied in Microsoft for a software developer role , my government exam result is still pending , I am even not sure where to go , IT field , government field or something else like start up.
How I can complete purpose of my life when I am living like this in this dark world 2000.

Business Associates

Business associates , sounds good.After doing graduation in IT finally I am end up with this job.
I passed the all round of interviews and got selected but after that I got to know what I have to do , to meet the random people to advertise the product , I don’t want to do this , first day my senior took me to a coffee shop , we had snacks and coffee there and then we went to a residential area and entered in the building by lying to security and went to all the flat , some of them listened us , some agreed , some even did not listened.
I am not gonna do this , even coding was better which I left.What should I do?
Government exam which I gave two weeks back didn’t go well , result not yet declared but Its not looking easy , I had hope with that exam , but I lost this chance , there was 100 question and 60 min and you need to fill the small circle of right answer with your pen like radio button in web form, if you attempt all 100 question , it would take 8-10 min to fill 100 circle properly.It wasn’t on computer so we just click on the option and it got selected , what stupid thing this was , there was something more which we need to do in that 60 min.
So I was upset after exam , and then I got one mail for this so called Business associates role from a private advertising company , but it does direct marketing not like TV Commercial , banner or social media.
So now here I am , I always wanted to do something big for me , my family , my community , but what the hell I am doing.
It’s all because of me , I even don’t have aim about my career , what I want to be , I gave government exam , applied in company about business role , sometimes write stories in Urdu and I also have applied for software developer role in some big IT company like Wipro , Accenture , L&T , it’s not the end I also have applied for modelling , for acting role in various portal.This is what I am doing.
I don’t know where I will end up with , I am not sure about anything , I am living just purposeless life , So I am getting disappointment of this world and it will continue in the eternal life too.

Unlawful sexual intercourse , Zina

Time is going on , So life too.I never talked about one thing I have gone through even going , I got addicted of something bad 2-3 years ago.Earlier I thought Its gonna be okay but after three years its just like that.
I am not the true follower of Islam but there is something you have to follow in Muslim societies even if you don’t want.Islam prohibits the physical relationship with anyone except wife.Its a big sin , you can make physical relationship more specifically sex only with wife.Its such a big sin in the view of Islam that If any one who is adult , free and married get involved in unlawful sexual intercourse ,he/she will punished by stoning but if offender is not married , adult or free then punishment is little less not death.
In other religion like Hindus ,Christianities , Jews etc. there is no rule but in Indian culture too having a physical relationship was not righteous thing ,but things are changing fast,Indians are influencing by Western culture , the shame had already gone from high societies a long back , but now in middle class too , making physical relationship are not sees as a wrong things , but they can do anything because they don’t have any rule but I do have.
I am a virgin Muslim young man ,Just 20 ,I have feelings , sometime its like I cant stop , I just want to complete my desire but I also don’t
want to break the rule , there is one solution Islam given , its to get married.But now I cant get married ,I dont own home , no job ,just purposeless life.
In this modern world , its very hard to control your sexual desire , everywhere is adultery , exposing of a body ,even if you go out to roam around , you just see nudity.Its like you are hungry and there is food around you but you cant eat that.
People can criticize me because of this thinking but I am just being realistic , Its a fact.
Neither I can make relationship nor I can get married.
So I just involve in something which is also wrong in Islam , its not that big sin like unlawful intercourse but its sin too.But I want to get out of this bad habit , Its been three years , Sometime I left it for a months but because of this Modern nude world I again get involve.
I would try to apply the only solution which Islam given is to get married ,as soon as I settle , I am gonna get married ,but things not looking easy , just have hopes , My exam is on Sunday for some
central government officer , Its tough exam but I am trying.Lets see.

Night walk with friends

I haven’t write about myself for a long time.Actually there is nothing special going on.I am just living a sinful life.
Today my friend Asif called me for a walk at 11pm.We used to go for walk including Ehsan and Faiyaz but now everyone got busy in thier lives , jobs etc.Anyways I went there , as usual Ehsan and Faiyaz was there too.
We was walking and talking , took some soft drinks.Faiyaz was telling his school time story , Asif also shared some of his story , actually I wasn’t with them neither in school nor in college.So I do not know about their schools lives.
I was listening them but my mind was somewhere else , I had something to share with someone but couldn’t get chance.Faiyaz was sharing his stories with expression , moving his hand , his way of explaining something is amazing.Even the topic is not interesting but he makes it. Suddenly Faiyaz phone rang so he received it and became slow then Asif asked about me , I replied causally , but when he asked “anything else ?” Then I started like this “Yeah , I had something to share with I gone through ” but suddenly Faiyaz came back and started from where he left and then my story just gone.
Everyone thinks about themselves , what feelings someone else have , it doesn’t matter.I am not saying it to my friends , they are good guys , even my friend Asif have done favour for me many times when I needed and even if I do some favour for him someday, it wouldn’t be equal what he did for me.
So I was telling about my story which I couldn’t share with my friends , it’s little long , how a girl came and proposed me and disappeared and then came back after two years , how my mom always doubted me for a girl even though I had never been in a relationship.So it’s little long but interesting , but I don’t know why this kind of things happens with me.
Anyways , I am not gonna write my story now , actually I filled a form for some high ranked government officer job which I can’t write here now and exam is in the next week , I am preparing for it , although don’t have resources to study , still no laptop , no money for books and I don’t ask to my parents , just use mobile phones to prepare for exam , chances are little less but still my all hopes are with this exam , if it got cleared , insha’Allah my purposeless life would turn into purposeful.But if I couldn’t make it , it’s gonna be a …..I don’t know.I just want to clear this exam , this is my biggest dream now , I would never forget these days of my life when I struggled for basic things and once asked something to my uncle and he just forgot in his busy schedule but after all of this , still hopes are there . Hazrat Ali once said stars always shine in the darkness.

10nth of Muharram

An important day Yaume Ashura or 10nth Moharram was 4 days ago. Hazrat imam Hussain r.a. gave the sacrifice of his life and their families lives to save the Deen and raised the words of Allah on that day.Yazid who wanted hazrat Hussain to accept him as a caliph but he was not the right person to become a caliph , so Imam Hussain didn’t accept him and because of that many Muslims was against the Yazid , So he forced Imam Hussain who was living in Mecca that time , So some people from kufa where Hazrat Ali(Father of Imam Hussain) used to live during his time of caliphate invited him , they said you come in this city , we all citizen will be with you and we will fight against the Yazid , thousands of people are in your favour and this number is increasing continuosly , You are the right person to become a caliph, you are grandson of Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W) and the son of Hazrat Ali.
Huzrat Hussain don’t had greed of becoming a caliph but that time in Arab , no was better than him , no one was the right nominee of caliphate, and he don’t wanted that it goes in wrong hand , So After receiving hundreds of letter from kufa they sent his cousin to kufa to see the situations , when his cousin reached there , all the leader of the city and nearby came and assured him that we are with Imam Hussain and they said when Hazrat Hussain will come here , we will throw the city of governor who is from Yazid and then whatever Hazrat Hussain will do , We will be with him.
So he informed Hazrat Hussain about the situation and said they all are really with you , now you should try to reach here as soon as possible.So when Hazrat Hussain got this message , he decided to go there and started preparing ,When people of Mecca and near by got to know that he is leaving Mecca , so they came and requested him to not go.They really loved Hazrat Hussain , they had doubts on the people of kufa because once they betrayed Hazrat Ali( Father of Hazrat Hussain). But Hazrat Hussain said , I have made the decision , Now I have to go and I am leaving this city soon.And after some days he was leaving that city with his family , People of Mecca was crying , they don’t wanted him to go , they belongs to the family of Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W.).But he had to go because deen was being erased , caliphate was in wrong hand.So he leaved Mecca with his family and started a journey which never ended.
But on the other hand , Yazid was not unaware about all the situation , center of caliphate was in Syria that time , so he sent his army to stop Hazrat Hussain , when Hazrat Hussain reached at the Karbala region , Army of Yazid and 4-5 thousands people from kufa who assured to accept Hazrat Hussain as a caliphate met there.
Some people also says there was 10000 soldiers in the army but the other side there was less than 100 including women and children.
When both were in front of each other Hazrat Hussain gave the emotional speech.He said , don’t you know I am the grandson of Prophet Muhammad , I am the son of Hazrat Ali , My mother was the daughter of Prophet Muhammad.Am I not better in all of you , why you want to fight with me , Prophet Muhammad said if anybody see a emperor doing prohibited things of Islam and do against the sunnat of Prophet Muhammad , break the rule of Allah , rule over the people ruthlessly.And after seeing this he don’t oppose that emperor then he will be with him in the hell.
Finally the battle started , there was only 72 men in the side of Hazrat Hussain.They all got shaheed including 6 months child of Hazrat Hussain.
They sacrificed their lives to save the Islam , but what we are doing.Breaking the rule of Allah , we have such a nice religion , but we are following the darkness of western cultures which leading us to disappointment of not only this world but the hereafter.
May Allah give us hidayah and make successor of this world again .

My birthday ( 4th September)

Today is my birthday but in our Muslim society we don’t celebrate it.
It is not a special day for me , and when our lives goes purposeless then we don’t like anything.But yeah , on social media friends sends you wishes.I was getting wishes on social media too like Facebook , what’s app , some of my friend called me too.
Now days some people keep their friends DP on their birthday.But this kind of things doesn’t matter for me.
Khair , Mujhe yakeen nhi ho rha Mai 21 year Ka ho gya , waqt bs guzarte ja rha h , lekin Zindagi me bahut sari bate hmare Dil pe naqsh ho kr reh jati h , choti chtoi bate , Jaise ki mere uncle , he is earning a lot in fashion designing field , So when he was going village for summer vacation , I went to meet him , or Mai unse Bola ki mere laptop me problem ho gyi h , aap usko repair krwa de ya koi laptop Ka arrangement kr de kyunki mujhe interview ki preparation krni h.Unke liye laptop wagairah buy krna normal bat h.Unhone mna to nhi kiya bt bole Mai dekhta Hu..Then he went village or shayad meri bat bhool gye ya pta nhi , that time month of Ramadan was going on so he gave iftar party to all of our villagers then he bought a bike costs 1.5 lac , and did many things but he forgot that his nephew came to him and asked for laptop , SB waqt or paise ki bat Hoti h , Waise hmare family relations achche hi rhe bt I rarely asked anything from him.
Now he came back to Mumbai and I went to meet but I didn’t say anything about laptop and he also.
Ye koi bdi bat nhi thi , or mere uncle ko to isse koi farak b nhi pdta lekin Zindagi ki ye talkh yade hm asani se nhi bhoola pate.
Kya pta kl MERI qismat mujhe bulandiyo pr pahuncha de , or mere liye ye Chand hazar ki cheeze koi waqat na rakhe , lekin chah kr b mere Dil me mere rishtedaro khas kr uncle ke liye wo jgah nhi aa skti Jo aani Chahiye.
waqt ke Sath ye gam b shayad thode kam ho Jayenge .Lekin Qismat me likhi hui museebato ke alawa aksar hmari zindagiyo ke bahut Sare andhere hmare khud ke bnaye hote h , or HM chah kr b in andhero se nhi nikal pate.
Kyunki Hum APNI khwahishat ko poora krne me lg jate h , phir APNI khwahishat ke gulam bn kr Zindagi ke itne azeem maqsad ko zaye kr dete h.

Mumbai flood 29 Aug 2017

Today , I am gonna write in Hindi/Urdu.My English is very weak and when it’s about to express feeling then I am worst in it.
Its been raining for two days and still raining.Its normal in Mumbai.But who knew it would be a second big day after 26 July 2005.
I was sitting at my friend shop because after quitting my job , I had nothing to do. It was raining continuosly , Or Pani dheere dheere uski shop me aane lga , usne zaruri Saman ko upar rakhna start kiya. Mai Bola mujhe ghr ja kr dekhna Chahiye ki wha SB theek to h , or jb Mai ghr aane lga to raste me meri kamar tk Pani aagya tha .Raste me hi mere uncle Ka office b tha or usi se sata unka karkhana , jb Mai wha gya to Dekha ki poore office or karkhane me Pani Bhar Chuka h or sari machine adhi doob chuki h.Wo Sb important Saman ko upar Rakh rhe the , Mai b unki help krne lga.Uske bad Mai jldi jldi ghr pahuncha to Dekha ghr me 2 feet Pani aa Chuka h lekin mere dad or bhaiyo ne SB zaruri sapan second floor pe Rakh Diya tha.Mere neighbors ke ghr me b same situation thi.Mai thodi Der ghr me rha phir bahar Nikal gya or seedha meri aunty ke ghr gya Jo wha se nazdeek hi tha , she has two daughters , Elder one has done MBA and the second one is engineer and both are doing job about 100 km far.Or jb zyada barish Hoti to train bnd ho jati h jisse aane Jane ke raste bnd ho jate h , or road se AANA b bahut dushwar hota h , jb Mai unke ghr gya to mere uncle aunty dono bahut tension me the , ek to Woh ldkiya thee or itni door , or unke zehan me 2005 Mumbai flood ki yade tazah ho gyi , jb meri bdi cousin doobte doobte bachi.Filhal 2005 ke jitna Pani nhi aaya tha lekin barish continue ho rhi thi or Pani bdh rha tha or kuch pta nhi ye kab tk Hoti rhegi.Maine unhe btaya abhi situation theek h , tension ki koi bat nhi h..unhe bolo ki office me filhal rhe , they will be safe there or rasto Ka koi bharosa nhi train to bnd h or barish continue hoti rhi to highways b bnd ho jayenge…unse bate krke Mai main road ki traf gya , barish abhi b ho rhi thi or Kahi Kahi pr pani kamar se upar tak aa gya tha.Road pr pahuncha to Dekha afra tafri Ka alam h , log bus , cars bike ko chod kr paidal Nikal pde h Apne ghr ki traf , abhi zyada tr jagho pr pani kamar tk tha , lekin logo ke dilo me ek dar tha , unhe 2005 ka flood yaad tha , or aaj ke halat b waise hi hote ja rhe the , area ke kuch log , logo ko rasta dikha rhe the , Mai b kafi Der udhar hi rha , logo ki bheed kam hone lgi thi , barish ab b ho rhi thi ,or andhera b failne lga tha , mahul pe ajeeb sa khauf Chaya hua tha , mai chlte chlte western highway pr pahunch gya , bahut sari gadiya rasto me pdi thi , log imported cars ko yuhi chod kr chle gye the , Zindagi ke samne kainat ki koi cheez waqat nhi rakhti , ye Mai aankho se dekh rha tha .Mai 3 hours se continue Pani me tha , badan me thodi kapkapi aane lgi thi , Raste me hi ek BMW car lgi hui thi , Mai uspr Chad gya , Mera Pura badan kaanp rha tha , door door tak sirf Pani tha , Mai uski chat pr seedha let gya , barish Ka Pani seedha mere chehre pr pdne lga ,Maine aankhe bnd krli , Mai Soch rha tha insan kitni b traqqi krle wo qudrat ke aage bahut chota h , India is not that much developed but Japan , America wagairah b khud ko qudrati afat se nhi bacha pata h , Insano ki hr tadbeer nakam ho jati h , Mai seedha besudh pda hua Soch rha tha , Mere andr ek khauf paida hone lga tha , fear of death , honestly mujhe maut se bahut dr lgta h , kyunki Mai janta Hu meri Zindagi kis trah guzri , Allah ke hukmo ko Tod kr , or is wjah se Mai is duniya me b aafiyat wali Zindagi nhi guzar ska, or phir aakhirat ki Kabhi na khatam hone wali Zindagi , or Kabhi na khatam hone wali takleefe.Mai soche ja rha tha , na Jane Kitna waqt guzar gya , barish ab thodi kam hone lgi thi , lekin Charo traf andhera cha gya tha or electricity b chli gyi thi , achanka mujhe ghr Ka khyal aaya , Mai car se neeche utar gya , Pani kamar se upar tak aa Chuka tha , Or Pani thanda mehsus ho rha tha , Mai dheere dheere India ke sbse traqqi yafta city ki road pr chlne lga , barish abhi b ho rhi thi , mujhe Zindagi bewaqat lgne lgi thi , Mai qudrat ke samne ek bebas taraqqi yafta city ko dekh kr Allah se Dil me duanye mang rha tha.

I quit

It’s was a 10nth day of my boring job , I earlier liked web development field , but now I don’t know what happened , I don’t like this anymore , whether it’s because of my company or environment or maybe it’s not the things which I wanted.
How I spent 9 days , i can’t explain , I used to feel like prisoner , my manager always keeps eyes on me , waking up at 7-8 am , taking breakfast , going for job by Mumbai local , And I have already explained about Mumbai local , and changing two train to reach office , spending 9 hours there , once I literally cried in train when coming home , I got bored , fade up and damn coding.Oh my God.
Anyways, that day my manager went to met the client who’s website I created two days ago , After sending link to that client of his website , he called me and started to shout what you made , how rubbish this is bla bla..
And client called me because my manager wasn’t receiving his call , I told everything to my manager , Manager told me to say to the client that we will meet you tomorrow ,and he didn’t went to meet him and client was continuously calling me and shouting , finally he went today and when came back , he started to shout on me.He showed me my mistakes in website , That was correct , but he should check the website before sending it to client and I am a fresher , I could make a mistake , so it’s his responsibility.I was already frustrated , I Just said him , I can’t do this job anymore , keep it with you , thank you and leaved the company.And this was not the only reason to quit.I feel burden , boring and more specifically a purposeless thing.
I was standing on the gate of train , it was raining , not heavy , I was thinking …now what , a jobless IT Graduate , who don’t like coding , programming and suffering from disease of being famous , Suddenly heavy rain started , few peoples went inside , but I was still there..I was feeling a joy inside me , A free life like a bird who can do anything , I don’t had regret of quitting a job , the joy I felt that time cannot explain in word.